Monday, July 6, 2009

life is unfair but i'll keep on going


I never really believe in discrimination, though I know it happens. It had happened to my dad, my mom, my sisters and brother. These people I mention are the people enslaved by discrimination at workplace, and I thank Allah, now that my dad has retired and will be followed by my mom who is planning to take an option-leave at the age of 55.

I never really believe in discrimination, though I knew how much hurt it'll cost. But now I do believe. Because I myself have been the victim of hatred and injustice happening in my own school. The school where I dedicate half of my day at, the school where I should feel happy and safe. The school where I should come to and fro with smiles and not tears. But I dont feel like it now, beacuse sometimes what lies beneath myself are hatred and maybe vengeance.

Nauzubillah, never in my heart would I want to take on vengeance on anyone, though I have to admit that I hate you. You who put on a mask and beneath the mask is only cruelty, shows no-empathy and gives no mercy towards a nobody like me.

I'm not like any other people who could smile all the time, I may be a bit slow but I do my work with all my heart and patience. I'm not like any other teachers who could compliment on your nice kurungs, I'm not the ones who always look for you at your office just for your signature, I'm not the ones who open up easily to people like you. I'm not the ones who could easily have a nice chat with you at the canteen.

that DOES NOT MEAN I'm arrogant. That DOES NOT MEAN that I'm mean. That DOES NOT MEAN that I have no potentials in me. That DOES NOT MEAN that I don't do my work. That DOES NOT MEAN that I could not bring out the best in me.

I pray that Allah will always be with you no matter what you have done to me and your other victims. I pray that Allah will show you guidance. I pray that one day you will realize your wrongdoings towards me. I pray that Allah will give you MERCY though you never gave me one.


Ya Allahumma Amin, please give me strength.

Friday, July 3, 2009

i wonder..


Assalamualaikum and greetings to all readers..

I'm sure that everyone is much aware of the not-so-recent issues of the 'Datukships' title in Malaysia. Well, I'm just wondering why such title could easily be for sale. And of course, who am I to overstep the decisions made by the authority, but surely this baffling scenario makes me and even you wonder.. Moreover, we have got used to this issue that we have become ignorant sometimes. It's not that I'm questioning the system today, but to what extent somebody could be given such a BIG title? Is somebody with many contributions to the country entitled to the title itself? Or is it someone who successfully bring and carry the name of our country to the world is good enough to be recognised with the title 'Datuk' or 'Dato' with their name? And how do you actually count somebody contributions towards the country?

I dare not to mention any names related to this issue as it is quite sensitive. But what if these recognition, status and title are credited to the wrong people? What if they really do not deserve whatsoever recognition given to them, instead maybe it should be given to those who deserve it more than them? To those who are much more competent maybe? Even worse, what if those who deserve it are blindly overlooked? Well, it's hard to express it this way cos people might think that you are jealous of someone's title, but believe me, I don't feel a thing! I'm just wondering cos I believe that people should be given recognition based on what they have contributed and served. And at least, the contribution that they have given SHOULD also serve as beneficial enough towards the religion, nation and the next generation. And if somebody is given this status just because they are good at singing and acting, are they deserving enough to be given such title? Please don't get me wrong as I'm not against anyone but at least, please give the normal people a chance to believe that they also have contributed much to the country and that they have served for the country just as much or maybe more that the people who had been given those titles. I myself would personally feel happy and glad for those who get promoted and recognised for what they have contributed.

p/s: Teachers are like candles... They burn themselves just to light up the life of their students.. Should teachers contribute a lot to the country, aren't they all deserve the 'TITLE' as well? ;p Think about it...

About Me

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Taman Permata, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
Someone who wants to start with a clean sheet.